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12 Genuine Positives of Long Distance Relationships

Mention “long distance relationship” to someone, and they’ll probably think the worst. 

It’s hard being constantly apart from your partner. But—believe it or not—there are definitely upsides to being in a long distance relationship. (Of course, the main reason is that you’re both deeply in love with each other!)

So if you’re wondering if it’s worth starting one, or you need some encouragement after enduring several months of being apart, here are 12 reasons for going through all this.

  • Distance really does make the heart grow fonder
  • Your communication will improve a lot
  • You get creative
  • Your trust is strengthened
  • Your emotional bond improves
  • Reunion sex
  • Your cherish every moment
  • There’s no room for pettiness
  • If you’re in an LDR, it’s pretty serious
  • You can enjoy some independence
  • Excuse to travel
  • Your skills in an LDR carry through afterwards

1. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder

woman in gray sweater drinking coffee
Credit: bongkarn thanyakij

It’s a cliche, but being apart from your partner will really make you realize how much you love them

When we were doing long distance, it only made me realize how much I was actually willing to do to make it through to the end with this woman. 

Of course, there were hard times and I would have fleeting moments of doubt. But that’s exactly what they were—fleeting. Seeing her on the other end of our daily calls only served to strengthen my love and devotion to her. 

I know, I’m getting a little sappy here. But it’s true! There’s even a study done on “geographically separate” relationships where people in long distance relationships would idealise their partners. Plus, the same study found that trust and satisfaction levels in long distance relationships are equal or even higher than local ones.

So there. 

2. Your communication will improve a lot

cheerful surprised woman sitting with laptop
Credit: Andrea Piacquadio

In a long distance relationship, you obviously just can’t hop in your car and drive over to see them whenever you feel like it, so you may only have a few hours in the day to talk with them.

You’ll also likely be restricted to using your phone, tablet, or computer to talk to each other. Talking with your partner through a pane of glass really does change the dynamic of your interactions.

You may also be living in different parts of the world with huge time differences. So whenever you’re awake, they’re getting ready for bed, and vice versa. 

When you only have a limited window of communication, you learn to make the most of every minute you have with them. You make your words count, because words are what you both have to work with.

You’re both purposeful in your actions together, because you want to make the most of your time with each other.

And if there’s something important to discuss, or something weighing on either of you, you learn to call it out and address it. Staring at your partner through that pane of glass and picking up on subtle emotional cues can give you a kind of sixth sense that something is wrong.

The best thing? When you both reunite, those communication skills will carry through. You’ll have no problem knowing exactly how to talk to your partner in a way that’ll make yourself understood and to get their attention. Those skills will pay dividends the whole time you’re together.

3. You get creative

keyboard gaming moody gamer
Credit: Lucie Liz

Being restricted by mobile devices and computers? Not being in the same room? No problem! You can still have a great time.

You’ll figure out new ways to bond and enjoy each other’s presence. Whether it’s watching movies and TV, reading books to each other, enjoying listening parties, being intimate with each other, or playing a fun video game or board game together, you’ll figure out new ways to connect and show love every day.

Stuck for ideas? I have a list of activities you can do with your partner over one night, or several nights.

4. Your sense of trust is strengthened

Credit: snapwire

Maintaining a long distance relationship with your partner is a big trust exercise.

You won’t be able to stay with them all the time, or even talk to them all the time. You also won’t constantly know where they are, and they won’t know what you’re up to either.

But part of the strength of a long distance relationship comes from the implicit trust that they won’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable. It also comes from the fact that if there’s anything the other person needs to know, it will be said, and that there are few secrets or surprises.

A lot of people won’t go through something like that, and that’s fine. But those that are willing to enter a relationship like this will find that their sense of trust and loyalty grows stronger when the distance is closed.

5. Your emotional bond improves

couple embracing
Credit: Jonathan Borba

There’s something about enduring a difficult situation together that strengthens a social bond between two people.

In other words, “misery loves company”!

Research published in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, showed that shared pain may have positive social consequences. The study likened the bonding as a form of “social glue”, and may point to why comradeship occurs between people who go through difficult and painful experiences.

Admittedly, a long distance relationship can be stressful and difficult to go through. At the same time, you may find that it’ll make you even closer to your partner, especially if you’re both striving towards a common goal.

6. The reunion sex is great!

Enough said.

7. You cherish every moment

woman smiling while using laptop
Credit: Andrea Piacquadio

Since you might only have a few hours in a day to talk with them, you feel truly thankful for those moments when you’re there.

And when you close the distance, you appreciate your relationship and time together even more.

While my wife and I were apart, we would have two main windows: when I was preparing to sleep and she was getting ready for work in the morning, and when I was having lunch and she was having dinner.

They were the best parts of my day.

Each of our calls would last less than an hour to about two or three hours. And we’d stretch every minute.

I looked forward to every time I could talk with her, and appreciated the time we could spend together. Now that we’re reunited, those feelings are stronger than ever, knowing what we both went through. Every day, I’m thankful for being with her and seeing the distance through to the end.

8. There’s no room for pettiness

women hugging on beach
Credit: Anna Shvets

Being in a long distance relationship will make you reconsider all the “small stuff”.

Since you only have limited time to talk, you’ll quickly discover that the little arguments and the bickering won’t lead to anything. You won’t be able to kiss and make up in the physical sense, because you’re thousands of miles from each other.

And if someone holds on to petty issues, it makes the long distance relationship that much more difficult.

If the relationship is important to both of you, each of you will quickly learn that there isn’t any point in devoting all that energy to minor arguments. You’ll also recognize which issues are genuinely serious, and you won’t waste time talking about them out loud, and getting to the bottom of them.

9. If you’re in a long distance relationship, it’s pretty serious

Credit: Maria Lindsey Multimedia Creator

Not everyone will raise their hand to willingly do something like this!

If you’re willing to enter a long distance relationship, you’re likely the kind of person that is willing to go through some short-term pain to enjoy the benefits of a great partnership at the end.

It also speaks to how seriously each of you are taking the relationship. You’re both willing to look beyond the physical, and make the most of the situation until you can both see each other again.

And if you both already have the end in mind, you’ll be working as a team to make that happen.

10. You can enjoy some independence

sportive woman with bicycle resting on countryside road in sunlight
Credit: Andrea Piacquadio

Having said that, sometimes you just want a bit of time to yourself. There are plenty of opportunities for that in a long distance relationship!

Don’t get me wrong; you’re still in a committed relationship. However, I personally found there was less pressure to hang out all the time. My wife and I had our communication schedule, and I knew exactly when I would be spending time with her, and when I would be left free to my own devices. She’d have the same opportunity to socialize and go to classes as well.

Being free to pursue our own goals and knowing that we could connect at the end of the day really heightened our sense of trust in each other. Plus, we knew our relationship was serious, partly because we were doing distance, so we were comfortable with how each of us spent our time.

And besides—it’s healthy for couples to have their own personal time, as long as there’s a good balance between the two.

11. You can travel and share your culture

cheerful young ethnic woman pointing up in ark
Credit: Ryanniel Masucol

If you’re both from different states or different countries, you’ll find that being in a long distance relationship will broaden your horizons and open your mind to new experiences.

Learning about your partner’s local culture and their heritage can be a great experience. Travelling through their state or their country can also be a lot of fun—especially when your partner is a local!

The same goes for the opposite direction, too! It’s a lot of fun sharing things about your home and your lifestyle that they may not necessarily know. They’ll also gain a deeper understanding of where you come from and how it shapes you as an individual.

12. Your long distance skills carry over when you’re back together

man and woman holding hands walking on seashore during sunrise
Credit: Asad Photo Maldives

Pressure makes diamonds, or so they say.

When you finally close the gap and continue on your life journey together, you’ll realize that all of those skills you had to pick up as part of your long distance relationship have carried over into “real-life”.

You may find that you’re able to navigate problems more easily, now that you can stay in the same room and talk whenever you want to. You might drop the small issues here and there, because in the grand scheme of things, you realize that it’s just not that important. Or you might find yourself really appreciating their time and company, even though you have it all the time and whenever you want.

Going through a long distance relationship can teach you coping and communication skills that you may not find elsewhere. It can also help temper your partnership and make you feel like a stronger couple in the end.

You’ll both feel that if you can handle long distance, your relationship can handle anything.